REVIEW: alt.rap.unsigned.tape

VARIOUS ARTISTS -- "alt.rap.unsigned.tape" Independant, FREE (with supplied 90-minute cassette and SASE) Cassette, 16 Cuts

Rating: 4.0

The InterNet has spawned many interesting discussions from many newsgroups. One of these groups is alt.rap -- simply _the_ place to drop the knowledge on hip-hop with other people around the world. Well -- now the alt.rap MCs have a compilation out. And believe me -- every single artist on this tape is true to the game, or else they wouldn't have participated in this non- profit album. Each group on this album is without a major label contract -- in fact, as far as I know, all the groups that sell their material do it through their own means. 100% underground and independant.

To start, the playlist is as follows:

Intro... DOA (Da Other Asiatics)
Buck Ya Head... DOA
Mind Ya Bizness... DOA
And Ya Don't Stop If There's No Cop... Headshop
Checkmate... Blue Riddle Productions
P.M.S.... Sudden Death
Praying to the Porelain God... Sudden Death
D.O.L.... Droppin' Knolege
Bustin' Caps... Ebony and Ivory Produkshunz
Backstreet Buddhabop... Union of Authority
Must Be the Music... Lyrical Prophets
Lazy B Freestyle... Lyrical Prophets
Lyrical Prophets... Lyrical Prophets
eMpTyV... M.C. Flash X
It's Not Over... Shyguy Productions
I Don't Give a Fuck... Shyguy Productions

DOA may seem like the average hip-hop band, but these guys are truly "Da Other Asiatics" -- the MCs are of mainly Taiwanese decent. But DAMN! These kids have skills on the mic that I haven't heard from most major label crews. I don't know where they recorded and mixed down, but even if it was in a studio like it sounds, it's obvious they spent a lot of time working to get their shit straight. I look forward to being able to lay down tracks with these MCs in the future.

The album starts off with a mock-love song, "Intro". It's along the lines of Too Brown's "Silly Love Song" from back in the day. You know these boys got it going on lyrically from the get-go: "Girl: if you were a newspaper, then would be your ink, / If you were a piece of doo-doo, then I would be your stink."

My favorite track on this compilation is DOA's "Buck Ya Head". The beat booms with a passion and the MCs get wreck to the point of no return. There is pure energy in this track, and it's transported directly from the MCs to the listener: "I leave the traces of my laces on your faces / With a swift kick to the temple. / Buck ya head it's that simple." The chorus makes beautiful use of a Cypress Hill vocal and crazy phat horns. More proof these kids got the lyrics to get them a deal: "Ya try to flow, but ya show no proof, G. / You're like a Disney porno, you're so fucking goofy." They live up to their self-description: "the Won-Ton Dons".

"Mind Ya Bizness" is the third and final track on this album from DOA. It's more of a kick-back track than "Buck Ya Head". But, no doubt, there is a message here. They're sick and tired of commericalized rap hitting big and the whole hip-hop nation being exploited by the big boys up in marketing. My boy Chops kicks it: "Flippin' through the channels, suddenly I give a frown, / Oh boy, the Doughboy is trying to be down." One must really sit down and listen very carefully to these lyrics several times to pick up on all the intricacies.

The second group profiled on the "alt.rap.unsigned.tape" is the now defunct Headshop. I spoke with Matt Murillo, and he said the group disbanded peacefully and a few of the kids are working on their own stuff. Matt and I have a little something planned for the future. Anyway, there is an addictive bassline that is bound to get crazy heads bobbing. And those sleigh bells (DAMN! Is it Christmas?)... straight up, these boys got the lyrics and the production was quite nice. My only problem with "And You Don't Stop If There's No Cop" is the voices in spots seem a little distorted, but overall it's mixed better than a lot of stuff I've heard from unsigned artists. I have to give these kids crazy props for a dope track.

"Checkmate" comes from Blue Riddle Productions' "The Rap is An Art EP", previously reviewed in HI-TECH HOME Weekly #7. It's not an overly complicated song production-wise, it's fairly straightforward. But, that's how David J handles his shit. Despite the complaints that he looks like Vanilla Ice (just playing, G!), his lyrics are very well crafted. This whole track stays well focused on the rap-chess metaphor. I especially like the use of Brother J's (not David J's brother, I'm talking the lead MC from X-Clan) "Checkmate sucka', not a move: game's over!" The delivery is a little stiff, but the song carries well overall.

Sudden Death's main MC is my boy Spice. The guy is demented and he's not afraid to admit it. Their first track, "P.M.S." speaks upon the evil of the premenstrual woman. It's a spoof of Naughty By Nature's smash from '91, "O.P.P.". People seem to criticize the weak sound of the beats (which I agree, could use a little kick to them), but the thing about Spice is that his lyrics are crafted extremely closely to the style of the original track that he's spoofing. And they're downright _funny_!

There is a second Sudden Death track titled "Praying to the Porcelain God" which tells of the nasty aftereffects of overdrinking. Though the "kneel, vomit, flush" chant is dope, it doesn't quite match up to "P.M.S.".

As a side note, Spice is the one responsible for the funky-ass J-card.

Following is D.O.L.'s "Droppin' Knolege". The beat starts in a bit confusing -- the mood totally changes with the addition of each sample. That's not a bad thing, though -- it's different and quite interesting. The thing that I can't get over is how the MC sounds like a more nasal-version of Kid Frost. I'm not a big Kid Frost fan, but I do like this track, simply because it is very well produced. And what I like most is the absolutely incredible use of the Kool Keith vocal sample on the breaks.

Ebony and Ivory Produkshunz' "Bustin' Caps" has one of those classic hip- hop beats that gets the head nodding every time. There's not much kick to the drums and the lyrics start off shaky (somewhat fading in and out), but once the track gets moving, it works very well. The lyricsits are Hotsauce, D'selecta, Steele Joe, and B-Side and they each have a unique style, and though each style is different, every one flows nicely over the beat. Cool lyric of the track: "I blow shit up when I enter, / Like those same mother- fuckers in the World Trade Center." My favorite slice of the song is the break with some dope ragga-cuts by D'selecta.

The funk-filled "Backstreet Buddhabop" easily gets the award for best title. The lyrics have a sort of old-school flavor, but there's a funky little twist in there that makes it work well. When Spice and I first peeped out this song, we both broke out laughing at the hilarious nonsense rhyme: "Rhymes so fried by the time we hit the door, / So let's go buy eggs at the corner store."

Next up is my crew, the Lyrical Prophets. I'm the MC, so it's going to be hard for me to look objectively at our three tracks ("Must Be the Music", "Lazy B Freestyle", and "Lyrical Prophets"), but I'll try to stay fair.

All three tracks are from the full-length LP, "Armed and Dangerous". The first, "Must Be the Music" makes use of an early-80's disco-flavored sample. It is a dedication to the honeys of the universe and gives props to those that stay on the real to themselves. The break makes use of singing vocals from the original track.

The second side starts off with "Lazy B Freestyle", the second Lyrical Prophets track. The beat is nothing ultra-complicated: it's a simple old- school 45-King break. The flow and the lyrics are unique, and at times gross ("Maggots on your dick, now see what my rhymes did?"), but it's a straight up previously unrehearsed track.

The last Lyrical Prophets track is, simply enough, "Lyrical Prophets". This five-verse track combines a funky-ass harmonica track with Fu-Schnickens and old DOA (Dope On Arrival -- Lyrical Prophets' previous name) lyrics from back-in-the-day tracks. The flow is certainly unique, as are the lyrics ("Then there was the brother that called the Laze a pixie, / I kicked him in the dick, see, now he's whistlin' Dixie.").

M.C. Flash X takes his shot at Music TeleVision on "eMpTyV". Though it's a clever title, the track itself is fairly lacking. The beat is simply repeated over and over (you can even hear the SK-1 "loop" beep at one point) and the delivery is off. The lyrics themselves are OK overall, but it seems to me that this track was rushed. I give 'nuff respect to Flash for his magazine, HardC.O.R.E. and everything he does for hip-hop (he's definately on the real), but "eMpTyV" needs some work. Thumbs up for having the guts to express his views, though.

The album finishes off with Shyguy Productions, made-up of my boys T-Dub and K-Mello (T-Dub is the main person responsible for getting things with this tape together). "It's Not Over" kicks it on the freestyle tip. I really like T-Dub's flow ("But gimmie the fuckin' mic and I'll make a nigga cower.") a whole lot. His voice is medium-toned, but his rhythm is right on target which makes his verses work so nicely. K-Mello has an extremely deep, but crazy smooth, voice. His delivery is a very lazy type of flow -- somewhat resembling Erick Sermon's old shit on "Strictly Business". I like it -- it gives the sound of K-Mello riding the beat right to the end... he occasionally slips off-beat, but overall he kicks it smooth. And how can you not like the lyrics: "I'll call you Van Patten because you're a dick."

The second track from Shyguy Productions, and the last track on the "alt.rap.unsigned.tape" is "I Don't Give a Fuck". The beat is funky and the break makes good use of the classic Audio Two "I Don't Care" sample. The lyrics are very single-minded: sex, knocking boots, sex, waxing the booty, and sex. I tend to tire of sex tracks, but I like the delivery and the clever lyrics here. They're offensive, for sure, but one can't help but nod their head and smile at the words.

On the final tip, let me say that there is simply no true rap fan that should be without this compilation of true underground flavor. It's cheap: all you have to do is send a 90-minute blank tape and an envelope with appropriate return postage. Peep the shit out, straight up.

Shouts go to T-Dub and Fedde Engler for setting this up and T-Dub for doing the recording. Props also go to Spice for the cover and to all the artists for contributing.

--- Reviewed by Laze (Ryan A. MacMichael)

NOTE: To get your copy of this tape, send a blank 90-minute tape and a self-addressed stamped envelope (have appropriate postage attached!) to:

T-Dub/Shyguy Productions
100 Oxford Ave
Buffalo NY 14209